Pieces 2

Managed to catch In Pieces 2 by Sutra Foundation and Masakini Theatre Company curated by Wei Jun.

What beautiful choreography, I was almost in tears with some of the pieces as I was enthralled when dancers uses their bodies as vessel of storytelling. I finally get to watch Sabera Shaik, Rathimalar Govindarajoo and Suhaili Micheline perform. How amazing they are in their most natural form of art.

Please find time to watch this show, happening until 3rd November 8:30pm in Studio Ramli Hassan. Minimum donation is RM 50.

Halloween 2010

However you want to live your life – fun, reckless, wild, adventure, crazy, experimental, grunge, deep, promiscuous, mysterious – the golden rule is to be kind and never hurt others.

Have fun playing with your demons and satans. I have played with mine. Now even my demons have mellowed down next to me sipping honey lemon tea reminiscing good ‘ol times when tequila shots and poop always end up at the back of the car.

Happy Halloween, Pumpkins.

Paying an homage to Halloween

When I was a teenager, one of my favourite movies was James and the Giant Peach. It made me feel like a little kid stuck in Tim Burton’s mystical surrealism and somehow have carved my alter ego’s realm – one that my subconscious lives till today. It allows me to never let myself be vanilla.

For me, mystical surrealism is an escape from reality – an avenue where everything and anything is possible – with so much taste and never any limit to what one can stretch and do.

I am a non-conformist. In reality, I respect ways and structures; but in my heart, I understood being out of ordinary. There’s always a place for both to exist, maybe not at the same time, but never to be disregarded by any means.

Quantum physics. Metaphysics. Consciousness. Light realms. All these dimensions exist intertwined within our realities and understanding. And the hollow void in between of it is filled with nothingness. And in the depth of this nothingness, magic happens. As surreal as it sounds, you need faith to be able to experience it in its entirety.

Live your life as if you’re immortal. And then die.

Almost a decade ago, a random invitation by Shafina to watch a French movie at the GSC International French Film Festival allowed me the opportunity to watch Jean-Luc Godard’s 1960 ‘À bout de shouffle’. At that time I was very much into foreign and old films – Fellini, Almodóvar, Tornatore.

There’s a scene where they were interviewing a guy and he was asked how he wanted to live, and he replied, “To be immortal, then die.”

I have used that line as a reminder to myself every since – to be fearless and carefree in taking chances and opportunities so it could carve the journey of my life the best and the most that I can allow it to.

I see all around younger people talking about death, complaining about life – all from their comfort zone. I don’t blame them.

The world has turned into such – you experience life from a screen, not sweat. You experience emotions from a song, not heartbreaks. You experience pain from loneliness, not bruises.

Put down your phone. Hold someone’s hand. Take out your earphones, listen to someone’s story while looking into their eyes.

Don’t feel defeated and validate each other’s death wish.

Live your life as if you’re immortal.

And then, die.

Review: Joker

I think it’s only fair to say that using the comic premise was an apt excuse to focus on a tale of a person’s struggle of purpose in existence.

Joaquin Phoenix is exceptional.

The only scene I didn’t necessarily like was his visit to Wayne’s house and encounter with little Bruce.

“Is it just me, or is it getting crazier out there?”

We live in a world that is facing an epidemic of loneliness.

With so much freedom, we fail to choose what’s best for us.

Joker has chosen.

And he’s laughing his way to the bank.

Rest your heart for more love to give okay? I wish for you abundance.

This morning I woke up and I have Prefab Sprout’s All The World Loves Lovers playing in my head.

It’s been quite a few months journey since I lost the love of my life – not that she has passed away but she has completely ghosted me and vanished from my reality.

As I look back to my first ever solid experience of a romantic love relationship – I am very glad I did it all the way, all to my truest self, the best that I can. I have loved truthfully, wholeheartedly, not a single cheat day that I loved any less than I am capable of. I committed myself through every hardship and joyful moments within the relationship. I realised every ideals – the fights, the conversations, the growth of dreams and potential.

I have created this prototype as a lover and for love – a standard I set never below myself. And today I woke up with a smile.

All the world loves lovers.

And may we never love any less than what we always wish we truly receive.

Because I am a person of my promises, and I have promised to myself to never give up on you

It’s raining heavily
And as I walk in the rain
I think of you
I think of me
I think of my life
And the life that is meant for me
And I feel like crying
Not because I am sad
But because thinking is heavy
Not that the thoughts are bad
But it’s just my heart smiling
For I never thought my life would take me here,
right here and right now
The entire journey brought me here,
right here and right now
I am thinking of you
I am thinking of me
I am thinking of my life
And the life that I’m meant to live

Always WANT to get better and be a better person

It’s World Mental Health Day.

The biggest learning is that self-care is not just about focusing on YOU but focusing on YOUR ENVIRONMENT.

Reach out to the right support system.

Choose to heal and grow.

Remind yourself that you WANT to get better.

Acknowledge your pain and emotions, not embrace or numb it.

The world is not fucked up, be kinder to it and have faith.

YOU make the first move.

Not Scared Anymore

My mind wrote this while I walk in the rain – which became an epiphany – I have stop being scared of the rain and embraces it.

You are now here
walking in a bubble of a random thought
currently circulating the mind
of a wanderous writer
who is walking amongst a sea of people
most of them confused of their life’s direction.
You, small as the smallest particle of dust
witnessing shoulders brushing against one another
ignoring pain in each other’s loneliness
in search of their own soul.
You could not close your eyes
And yet you are dreaming of a life
You could never imagine having
In this lifetime.