Are We Just Dandy?

321789440_3c446d7585_oFirst of all, I’d like to apologise to my dear friend, Raja Malek for indirectly ‘mencuri’ ideanya for the title. Dandy. 🙂

dan·dy  /ˈdandē/

Noun
A man unduly devoted to style, neatness, and fashion in dress and appearance.
Adjective
Excellent: “upgrading seemed a dandy idea”.
Synonyms
noun. dude – fop – beau – jack-a-dandy – coxcomb
adjective. swell – fine – dapper – foppish

Dandy is one of those words that should not be translated, because we would not find an equivalent to it in our language.

How this word came about in our conversation, was when we were talking about masculinity and femininity. My friend Jiman asked me, in a scale of 1-10, how butch am I? I told him, I’m a 6, but I really enjoy wearing women clothes as well. And we talked about how empowering being able to cross dress. I for one, is 1/2 of a Drag King duo, and once in a party held in Port Dickson, we performed Diana Ross’s “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”. There I was, on stage, a girl trying to dress like a boy trying to put on a women’s dress. The power of sexuality and sensuality overwhelmed me when I took that role. I was bold and brave enough to perform, touch myself and stride in such pride on stage.

And even so, in some occasions, I do enjoy the sexiness of wearing a kebaya or a dress. Despite my sexuality, I decided to trespass the labels and just be dandy. I don’t think the term reserved for men, as in today’s world, it all comes down to masculinity despite gender.

We live in a very androgynous unisex world. Our gender should not be determined by the clothes we wear.

Once, in Zouk KL, I was asked to pay for a men’s cover charge. Me and my friends didn’t realised it until we looked at the receipt (just to note, some people had a few glasses of wine before that).  The very butch girl who charged me as such probably thought she was doing me a favour. I could easily be offended but being me, I find it amusing (after paying 20 ringgit more than my friends).

Fact is, I’m tired of being classified by what I wear. There are days I don’t bother wearing nice clothes, there are days I like being girlie, and there are days when men’s clothes brings more comfort to me.

We should be free to wear whatever we want, as long as we don’t torture people’s eyes with it.

That’s my two cents. For now. And don’t go through JCrew’s New York Fashion Week’s line. I want everything they have right now, men ‘s & women’s.

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